


I have not the pleasure of understanding you

by rosasdeesperanca



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Charles Xavier has a Ph.D in Adorable, Charles is a physics teacher, Erik is a German teacher, M/M, Teachers AU, and they do stupid things as always, erik lehnsherr needs to relax i think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:41:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26405914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosasdeesperanca/pseuds/rosasdeesperanca
Summary: inspired by a tumblr post that said an english teacher and physics teacher hated each other and once the physics teacher handed back tests while the english teacher tried to lecture. i wrote this for my amazing friend, niamh and i hope you will enjoy it <3
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier
Comments: 4
Kudos: 76





	I have not the pleasure of understanding you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dnbroughs](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dnbroughs/gifts).



> the title is a quote from pride and prejudice and of course there is a Rainer Maria Rilke reference. it’s not one of my fics without a poet reference

Erik didn’t know why he still hung out in the staffroom. In the three years he had been there, he had talked to half of those people and he couldn’t say he liked most of them. And above all, there was this teacher he disliked more than all the others. He had arrived this year, all bright and young and incredibly obnoxious. With his English accent, his way of greeting everybody and most of all, his loud enjoyment at any time of the day. He had annoyed Erik at first sight. Perhaps, he was obtuse or whatever word someone would use to describe his behaviour but he didn’t want to try and appreciate him just because they were colleagues. It wasn’t his style. 

And here he was again, talking about his latest failed date, out loud, like everyone had to hear. Not that Erik was eavesdropping, again, he was just annoyingly enthusiastic and Erik couldn’t help but hear what he was saying. That was all. 

“So, he takes me to that fancy restaurant. And he barely speaks to me, most of the night on his phone and when he does speak, it’s nothing but work, work, work.” Xavier said as Erik was rolling his eyes, did this man ever go on a good date? Erik thought “I mean I love my job, but there are other things to talk about. And besides, I could hardly understand a thing he was saying.”

The lit teacher sitting with him laughed “Jesus, Charles. You really know how to find them.”

He hid his face in his hands “I know! I might stay single for the rest of my life.”

“I’m sure he will be the right one next time.”

Charles laughed “You said that last time too.”

“True but this time I mean it. I have a feeling.” She smiled. 

Erik went back to his book, wishing he hadn’t heard a word of this, if he didn’t dislike him he would find him a boyfriend himself just so that he could shut up about it already. Thankfully, Emma was coming to his table, wearing an outfit that was way too elegant for their surroundings “Nice suit.”

“Thank you, dear. Nice turtleneck, how many of these do you own?”

“I buy one every time I make someone cry.”

“That makes a lot of closets.” She took a sip of her soda “Eavesdropping on Charles again?”

“I’m not eavesdropping.” 

“Oh please, you can lie to everyone else but not me. You’re acting like a teenager with him.”

“How so?”

“You’re... weirdly invested in him. Everything he does seemingly annoys you but you still watch and listen. You barely acknowledge him when he’s around and yet you must know so much about him by now. Erik, you simply fascinate me, you’re like a very horny teenager who cannot admit to himself he likes the boy he says he can’t stand.”

He laughed sardonically “You think I’m attracted to him?” 

“Yes, that’s exactly what I think. You know, darling. Sometimes you want to have sex with the people you can’t stand and that’s okay.”

“No, that’s just you, Emma.”

She rolled her eyes “So delusional. Then why are staring at him every time he’s here, spending most of your time complaining about that time he said that or that time he did this.”

“Because he annoys me?”

“Yeah, keep telling yourself that.” 

They remained silent until Charles arrived with a bright smile, greeting them “Hello, Emma. Mr. Lehnsherr.” 

Erik hated when he called him Mister like he was one of his students but he couldn’t really blame him because the last time he tried to call him Erik, he didn’t answer. 

After Emma greeted him too and Erik nodded, he exclaimed “Oh, I love that book! I didn’t know you loved Rainer Maria Rilke. Did you talk about him to our students?”

Erik hated when he referred to them as “our students” like they shared something important. But he did enjoy talking about Rainer Maria Rilke “Yes, I did. A few times.”

“That’s great. I sometimes want to talk about literature or any form of art, really. But you know, physics teacher, not what’s expected of me.”

Erik knew it was an attempt as a joke, he was trying to be friendly but he only nodded. 

“I have to go, enjoy the rest of your lunch.” He said shyly “Oh by the way, you look fantastic, Emma.”

“Thank you darling.” She smiled as Charles waved. Then ten seconds later, she hit Erik’s shoulder “Why are you so mean to him?”

“I wasn’t mean!”

“You were! He was only trying to make conversations with you.”

“I answered.” Erik argued. 

“Yes, coldly.”

“Was I supposed to offer him flowers and thank him for his presence?”

“Listen, I’m not the warmest person in the world but that was definitely rude and you’ve proved to me once again that you cannot deal with your hormones. Please, do some introspection. For the love of everything that is good on earth.” She got up and kissed his cheek “Once you’ve done that, ask him if he wants to have sex with you, you’re so tense! That would do you some good.”

Erik went back to his book, definitely ignoring her. He had a right to dislike someone without any valid reason, thank you very much. When he got out of the staffroom, he saw Charles with his cup of tea, talking to yet another teacher, when Charles saw him, he waved and like a reflex, Erik waved back for the first time.

It was Erik’s last class of the week, he was really enjoying teaching them about the fifties in Germany when someone knocked. He ignored it, it was a lost student or Xavier, either way he didn’t want to open the door. A second knock, now Erik was sure that it was Xavier. He rolled his eyes for a second and kept his lecture going. But what surprised him was that Xavier did enter the room and started handing out papers like it was the most natural thing in the world. 

Erik blinked in shock, was he...was he really doing what Erik thought he was doing? Barging in the middle of his lecture like he owned the place and without asking for permission. Fucking rich kid, he thought, they were truly the same, all of them “Can I ask what are you doing?”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” He smiled “I just finished grading their papers. I didn’t want to bother you.”

“Your idea of not bothering me is giving out grades in the middle of my class?” He rose his eyebrows. 

“Well, I... I thought I could be discreet and leave as soon as everyone got theirs. But apparently I wasn’t so discreet.” Charles laughed nervously and a few students laughed too which annoyed Erik even more.

“Guess you weren’t.” 

“It will take me a minute, I’ll be gone right after. Like I was never there.” His smile was friendly but it was met with a frown. A mean one, that resumed Charles to silence. 

And that was it, that was Erik’s breaking point. He was tired of this game. Of him, getting into his space like he owned it and troubling his class “Didn’t you notice I was in the middle of something? Is it so important that they get those papers now? Or is his royal highness above basic decency?”

Charles was gaping like a fish, unable to respond “I-I...”

Thankfully, his students loved him and it was Jean who decided to defend him “Mr. Lehnsherr, I think Mr. Xavier only wanted to give us our grades, he is always on time and it’s our last class so it seems that he wanted to do good there.” And even though she hated to be rude, she had to add for good measure “He did knock, twice and you didn’t answer so...”

Charles nodded faintly as the whole class was still silent and Erik wasn’t so talkative anymore, the realisation that he probably overacted hitting him, as well as the clear knowledge that his entire class was feeling sorry for Xavier. He sighed “Give them their papers. Once everyone get theirs, and you write down your homework for next week, you can leave.”

Erik wrote the homework on the board, making sure not to meet anyone’s eyes, feeling truly alone in that moment. After a while, that Erik was unable to define, every student had left. The only person standing in front of him was Charles, taking off his nerdy glasses that Erik absolutely hated. He sighed “Hm, I’m just going to...” he pointed at the door and almost fell as he tried to leave. 

Erik reached out for him, not without rolling his eyes and making a snarky comment “Do you have two left feet?”

“Yes, in fact, I do.” 

Erik didn’t understand him, he kept on insulting him and he hadn’t reacted badly, he never told him to fuck off. And if Erik was honest with himself, he deserved it so he said in a very low voice, one that you could barely hear “I’m sorry.”

“What?” Charles frowned. 

“I said I’m sorry.” 

“Alright, so you won’t scream at me again?” He got up on his feet. 

“I wasn’t screaming.” 

“Yes, you were.” He laughed nervously “Can I... call you Erik?”

He nodded. 

“Erik, why do hate me?”

Erik was quiet. He didn’t know what to say. He had disliked many people in his life, but none of them had ever asked him why he didn’t like them. Probably because it had been very clearly mutual every time, and Charles had never shown any kind of real dislike for Erik. Sure, he had been...his usual self and that had annoyed Erik. But he never did anything against him directly. 

“I see you in the staffroom, you always glare at me like I just killed your entire family. And every time we see each other in the hallways or between classes you just...ignore me. Every time I said hello to you, you’ve barely answered. I don’t understand, I mean I know I can be annoying or overbearing but we’ve talked twice in a year, I can’t hardly grasp how you would know that. I want to understand so that I can be better, if I’m doing anything wrong...” Charles smiled shyly “Please just tell me.”

Erik was once again stunned, how could be so transparent and vulnerable with someone he didn’t know? How could he just ask for an explanation when Erik had none? He didn’t know why he hated him, if Emma had asked him, he would’ve said that it was his arrogance and confidence. The way he walked into a room like he owned it, his rich kid attitude that proved the likelihood of him never having to struggle with anything in his life. He would’ve said that his laugh was obnoxious and he always looked so joyful about everything. All those things annoyed Erik, that was why he couldn’t stand him. But now that he was in front of him, he wasn’t just an idea, a shadow. He was the real Charles Xavier with his clumsiness and own insecurities, and Erik couldn’t find a reason why he hated him. So he said the truth “I don’t.”

“You don’t?”

Erik shook his head “No, I... I misjudged you. I thought you were trying to get at me with all the time you were spending with my students after your classes or barging into my class. But you just wanted to be a good teacher and I’m a self absorbed prick, apparently.”

Charles laughed “Maybe not so self absorbed.”

He rose his eyebrows “What do you mean?”

“I mean I did try to see you every time, I led a student to yours after mine, I didn’t have to enter the room, just like today I could’ve given those grades to a student and left. But I didn’t. I wasn’t trying to get at you but I did try to make you notice me, this was just a misunderstanding.”

Well, now Erik was truly lost. He kept on blinking for a good minute. That made Charles laugh “I’m not making sense, am I?”

“That. Or I’m completely stupid.”

“What I mean is, I wanted you to like me. Part of it was because I am a people pleaser and I couldn’t understand why you hated me and the other part was... well I am incredibly attracted to you. I know I shouldn’t say this but it’s true. I mean, look at you!” He laughed “It’s like you came straight out of my biggest fantasy. Not to sound extremely creepy because you’re more than that. But yes, I am attracted to you even though you’ve been pretty icy to me ever since I’ve known you.” 

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologise every time, you know.”

“My mind is a blur right now so that’s the only thing I can say.”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to say anything. I’ll leave, it’s been a long day you’re probably tir-“

“No.” He followed Charles to the door, gently reaching for his arm “I can’t explain it now but perhaps I could...can I kiss you?”

Charles grimaced “That’s a strange request.”

“Yeah.” He looked away in embarrassment. 

“But not one that I would refuse.” He tried to make himself look taller, not a success if you asked Erik “You shall.”

“Okay.” He awkwardly held Charles’ face, looking into his eyes. 

“Is this your first?” 

Erik huffed “Shut up.”

It was Charles who kissed him, gently, more than Erik ever expected. More a gift than a kiss, it made his body shake a little. In a single moment, all of his beliefs concerning Charles disappeared. Like they never existed. He couldn’t deny that he enjoyed this, he couldn’t deny what he just saw and heard from him, how he opened his heart and let him see his vulnerability. Erik thought that he wanted to do this again, that he would do many embarrassing things to do this again. He also thought that Charles tasted sweet, probably of strawberry. He said as much when he stopped kissing him, and Charles laughed and told him he drank a strawberry flavoured tea while he was grading. 

“That explains a lot. For a moment I thought you naturally tasted of strawberry.”

“Oh, I do.” He grinned “But only on Friday, on Monday it’s mango, Tuesday it’s blueberry and-“

Erik kissed him this time, it was way less gentle. He had never been a gentle kisser, or really gentle at all. But as he kissed him, he realised how much he enjoyed this and how much he would like to do it again. As the realisation of what Emma said went through his mind, he felt like a Jane Austen heroine, unable to see her own attraction for the object of her desire. He disliked the idea but he liked it too, it was a strange mixture of feelings. He smiled, if he was a Jane Austen character now, then so be it. He was pretty happy in that moment and for once, he didn’t care about anything else.


End file.
